A Ninja and his Tank
by rapterjc
Summary: The sad story of what might happen if Rock Lee ever got his hands on a tank. OneShot story.


This is a One-Shot story of what would happen if Rock Lee got a tank. Read and review of how Lee destroys the village.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

* * *

As the sun rose over the horizon, it shined it bright light over the peaceful Leaf Village. The inhabitants of the village began to awaken from the light, and begin their day like any other normal day, but in one part of the village, one ninja was about to wake up to a very unusual day.

As the sun shined through the window of the young ninja apartment, the young genin named Rock Lee jumped out of his bed happily and full of energy.

"Yosh! Today's is going to be a most youthful day!" the excited boy screamed as he stood in the middle of his room wearing his green spandex suit.

Once Rock Lee was done shouting, Rock Lee continued his morning normally, he his combed his hair into the usual bowl-cut shape and sat down for breakfast, a bowl of cereal.

"Today, I'll run around the village 500 times on my hands. That will get me warmed up for the youthful missions that Gai-sensei will have for me and my youthful teammates." Lee said as he ate his cereal.

As Lee ate, his doorbell rang, and Lee got up to answer it.

"Yes, may I help you?" Lee said as he opened the door to find two cloaked men standing in the doorway. The two men wore black cloaks and weird masks that resembled different animals

"Yes, are you a mister Rock Lee?" one of the figures asked in a deep voice.

"Yes, I'm Rock Lee." Lee answered.

Just then the other figure set a small party cracker off that launched strings of confetti at Lee covering the genin all over.

Shocked at the explosion, Lee almost fell over, but was caught by one of the men and pulled back up.

"Sorry about that. My friend and I are from the GPD. Grand Prize Delivery." The man that pulled Lee up said.

Both men then twisted around like ballerinas and stopped pointing toward a large wrapped package behind them.

"How did I not notice that?" Lee asked himself.

"Oh well…uh that's not important. What is important is that you just won a brand new tank!" the two men yelled as the walls of the package fell to the ground revealing a tank.

"Yosh! I won a tank!" lee screamed with joy.

"Yes a tank! The same kind that other people use to destroy things for no real reason!" one of the men said in a cheesy announcer voice.

Lee then ran toward his new tank and hugging it on one of the treads while the two men were sneaking away.

"Hey wait!" Lee said as he noticed the two men leaving. "Don't I have to sign a form?" Lee asked them.

"Oh no. In fact you never have to fear from us again. Just have fun blowing things up with your tank." One of the men told Lee.

"Well I don't know if I want it. A tank is very dangerous." Lee said as he pondered over whether to keep it or not.

"A tank is very youthful. In fact Gai has one too." The two men told Lee.

"Really! Yosh!" Lee yelled happily. He then shook the two men hands and went back to hugging his tank's cannon.

Glad to know that Lee was keeping the tank, the two cloaked men left Lee alone with the tank.

"That was easy. Now to watch our brilliant plan unfold." one of the men whispered to the other.

With the two men gone, Lee opened the hatch that went inside the tank and slid inside.

"With my one tank, I'll be the most youthful ninja ever!" Lee screamed as he stared at all the buttons and levers in the tank.

"So many shiny buttons. I wonder what this one does." Lee said innocently as he pressed the big red button on the control panel. Outside the tank, a small opening opened up on the tank, revealing six missiles that began to fire off one by one.

The six missiles zoomed to different areas of the village and exploding as they collided with the spots, leaving six craters left behind.

Back inside the tank, Lee was unable to see the destruction he caused and kept pressing the big red button causing at least thirty missiles to fire off from the tank.

"That button must be broken." Lee said as he stopped pressing the button, unable to see all the craters the missiles made.

"I wonder how I move forward." Lee said as he pressed a smaller blue button. A small screen on top of the panel then lit up showing a part of the village in front of the tank.

"Yosh, I can finally see!" Lee said happily, as he pushed one of three levers forward. Just then the tank began to move forward.

"Oh I can't wait to show my youthful tank to Gai-sensei!" Lee said as he pressed another button causing the tank to turn around a corner.

"Oh. I wanted fireworks not to change direction." Lee whined as the tank finished turning down another street.

Lee then pressed a green button, causing the tank to stop temporarily and for its cannon to fire off a powerful death ray at the hokage's mountain faces, leaving a giant hole where the third hokage was.

"Yes, I now have a powerful laser. Now I'll show Neji who is the better genius." Lee said happily as the tank began to move forward.

"There it is!" a voice screamed from outside the tank.

Wondering who it is, Lee pressed another button, causing the screen to show the many angry faces of the villagers. Among them were the Rookie Nine and Lee's teammates.

"Oh, Neji! Tenten! It's me Lee!" Lee yelled from inside the tank to his two teammates.

"Lee? What are you doing in there?!" Tenten yelled at the genin.

"I won this tank in some contest! It's so youthful!" Lee told her.

"Lee, you have to turn that machine off. You already destroyed 75 of the village." Neji told Lee.

"What! Oh no, my youthful actions has caused the village great damage." Lee said sadly. Upset by his actions, lee pounded the tank's control panels with his fist, accidentally pressing a black button with skull and crossbones on it.

The screen then went black as a timer for ten seconds began to blink.

"Warning! Warning! This tank will self-destruct in ten seconds. Don't bother to escape, if you can hear this you are already doomed." A mechanical voice said from inside the tank.

All the villagers began to panic at the noise.

"Save the chips!" Choji screamed.

"I don't want to die a virgin!" Ino screamed

"This is so bothersome." Shikamaru said as he sat on the ground.

"Naruto, there's something I want to tell you before we die." Hinata began to say to Naruto.

"This can't be. I refuse to die until I become hokage!" Naruto yelled.

"No! I can't die until Sasuke returns my love!" Sakura yelled.

"Lee, you idiot!" Tenten yelled at Lee.

"I always knew this is how it would end." Neji said.

"To die like this. I wonder if it's youthful." Lee said as he stared at the screen as it closed on zero.

"Lee, don't just sit there! Press another button to stop it!" Tenten yelled at Lee.

"Right." Lee said as he began to press more buttons. He first pressed a blue button that caused put a dancing gecko on the screen, but the timer still remained.

Lee then pressed a red button that fired three missiles that went and destroyed the last three hokage faces

Out of time, the tank began to glow with a red light, ready to explode.

"Aaaaaaahhhhhh!" the villagers said as the tank was about to explode.

The tank however cooled down and stopped glowing.

"Huh, what happened?" Lee said confused at why the tank stopped.

"Lee are you alright?" Gai asked as he opened the tank hatch and pulled Lee out.

"Gai-sensei, how did you stop the explosion?" Lee asked his sensei.

"Simple Lee. I turned it off." Gai said as he pointed toward an on-off switch on the back of the tank.

"Gai-sensei tell me. Was my time in the tank youthful?" Lee asked his sensei.

"Lee…you idiot!" Gai yelled as he punched Lee across the street.

"Gai-sensei."

"Lee"

"Gai-sensei"

"Lee"

"Gai-sensei"

The two ninja then embraced as a peaceful beach appeared behind them.

"Oh Lee. I understand. It's because you wish to be the most youthful you can be that you destroyed the village, but this action can't be ignored. As punishment you must jog around the village remains 10,000 times!" Gai said as he stood in the Nice Guy Pose.

"Yes, Gai-sensei!" Lee agreed as he ran to begin his punishment.

With Lee gone and Gai following after the rest of the villagers stood there annoyed at the young Green Beast's behavior.

"You know. I wonder who gave Lee the tank?" Tenten asked as she stared at the tank.

"Who cares? The village is once again safe." Naruto said as he and the other ninja began to look around to see the charred remains of the Leaf Village.

Meanwhile outside the village, the two men that gave Lee the tank were standing on top of the trees staring at the village destruction.

"Told you giving that kid a tank would weaken the village." One of the men said to the other.

"Yes, now we can finally take the Nine-Tailed brat, oh this entire plan was so youthful. Hehehe." The other men said as he removed his mask to reveal himself to be Kisame.


End file.
